Thursday, 23 June 2011

A Cunning Financial Plan

Nickie Clegg is parading a brilliant idea about the taxpayers' £64 billion stake in RBS and Lloyds Group banks. Basically, everyone on the electoral roll would get "free" shares that they could sell and get the difference between the selling price less stockbroker's commission and fixed floor prices which would be remitted to HMG. They could buy Liberal Democrat memberships or Spanish cucumber farms.

Popular Nickie (12%) said, "Psychologically it is immensely important that the British people feel they have not just been overlooked and ignored.


"Their money has been used to the tune of billions to keep the British banking system on a life-support machine and they have absolutely no say at all in what happens when normality is restored.

"I think, in a sense, as a society we are condemned to take an interest in our banking system."

Did I write brilliant idea? Sorry, I meant absolutely sterling crap! There's 46 million people on the electoral roll, many dead or living in Bangladesh or Nigeria. A computer system would have to be set up (there's £10 billion gone to IT contractors) to administer everything : it would become a quasi- national ID. 90% of the shares would be given to people who would prefer lager, fags or mobile top-ups. The "financial investment community" would be able to buy up the shares very cheaply from such folk with the offer of glittery things. Just like how our friendly Russion billionaires became billionaires.

A word in your shell-like, Nickie, the British people feel they have not just been overlooked and ignored because LibDem tossers like you are in a "government" dedicated to pissing our hard-earned cash away on the EU and foreign aid. We know that Labour spent too much and that cuts are necessary but the cuts proposed are of things that we the electorate think are worthwhile. Public libraries, armed forces not limited to "boots on the ground". We don't want to pay windmill taxes on our electricity and gas.

I suggest that the taxpayers' shareholdings in the banks are converted into a national endowment to fund the stupid Department for International Development. All dividends will be paid directly to it up to a capped limit of 0.7% of GDP. The Treasury will not need to borrow more money every year for DfID's budget and the foreign aid leeches will learn how their 4x4s are paid for.

1 comment:

Thud said...

Yet again we can but dream.