Friday, 8 January 2010


One little known clause in the Lisbon Constitution places strategic minerals in member states under European Commission control. It has been agreed by the Commissioner that as the weather is colder in Scandinavia all Union grit and salt supplies will henceforth be flown by Airbus to Lithuania for distribution on snowier roads. Foreign Secretary David Milliband responded by giving his little brother Ed (in charge of the climate) a snowball down the back of his neck.
By the way, as it's rather cold in Germany, all natural gas from Russia for the UK will be turned off with effect 3pm todayfor two days so fill your bath with what you need to tide you over.
Well you did vote for the Constitution so why are you moaning?

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