Friday, 22 January 2010

Joined Up Government? Balls

I read this item on the BBC News website with interest. Sir Tim Berners-Lee, inventor of the interweb, has produced to enable HMG data to be accessed by interweb consumers more easily. One application called PlanningAlerts is designed to send details of nearby planning applications to registered users. Unfortunately, thanks to the Royal Mail being all proprietorial about postcodes, there is a zero-functionality status at present. Royal Mail, despite paying its Scotch CEO £1million or so including bonus (Ha!), is owned by HM Government. So why doesn't its CEO attend an interview without coffee to be told to stop mucking about and release the data? Because we are controlled by idiots waiting to be evicted whose main concern is finding post-election nonjobs for themselves.

A New Flag For England

Count the stars on the blue field. 51. Our Scottish Prime Minister and Chancellor bought an 84% share of the Royal Bank of Scotland to protect Scottish jobs. The Royal Bank of Scotland helped Kraft raise loans to purchase the English based Cadbury's chocolate company. Kraft has promised job losses, just like it closed Terry's of York and moved chocolate orange production to Poland. The Scotch Raj claimed it could not intervene in a free market. Hello, when the UK of which England is the majority shareholder, owns 84% of a bank it can tell that bank to do whatever it wants. But Scotch MPs have no loyalty to , liking of, or understanding of England. Most of them signed the infamous 1988 Claim of Right:

"We, gathered as the Scottish Constitutional Convention, do hereby acknowledge the sovereign right of the Scottish people to determine the form of Government best suited to their needs, and do hereby declare and pledge that in all our actions and deliberations their interests shall be paramount.
We further declare and pledge that our actions and deliberations shall be directed to the following ends:
To agree a scheme for an Assembly or Parliament for Scotland;
To mobilise Scottish opinion and ensure the approval of the Scottish people for that scheme; and
To assert the right of the Scottish people to secure implementation of that scheme."

Consequently, it is England's national interest to leave the United Kingdom and join the United States as the 51st state of the United States of America. The economic advantages of joining a market of some 300 million of the wealthiest people in the world who speak our language (almost!) compared to the dysfunctional EU are substantial and clear. England would retain its legal system. The Houses of Parliament would become the State Legislature for England and both chambers would, for once be the right size as fewer MPs and Peers would have constituencies or be needed. England would have 2 seats in the US Senate and more seats than California in the House of Representatives. The Monarchy could be retained as the authority to whom officers swear allegience etc but English citizens would vote for their President. England's share of the UK armed forces could be integrated very easily into, for convenience's sake, the USMC.

What's the downside of this proposal?

Saturday, 9 January 2010

Two Heroes

Sukhwinder Singh chased two muggers attempting to steal a woman's handbag. When he caught up with them they stabbed him to death.

Constable Peadar Heffron of the PSNI was critically injured by a car bomb placed by dissident republican terrorists. He's in the best possible hands at the Royal Victoria Hospital, Belfast. I wish him a speedy recovery.

Please take a moment to silently thank these two heroes whose only connection is that they share the quiet courage and selflessness that puts the safety of others before their own.

Friday, 8 January 2010

A Couple of Thoughts

I feel sorry for Peter and Iris Robinson MP. Mrs Robinson does not appear to be the nicest of people, like so many ultra-religious people, but I have sympathy for her depressive illness or perhaps extreme guilt at being caught out. In a democracy sunlight is the best guarantee of honesty of politicians so, all in all, I reckon the media intrusion, especially by the BBC, is fair game. But it is rather convenient to be brought up now, so soon after the Adams family incest scandal which went quiet very quickly. The media friends of the IRA have never gone away, y'know.

Following the Christmas Day Underpant Bomb Attempt much newsprint has been devoted to profiling passengers to ascertain whether or not they are potential bombers. The less thoughtful assume that suicide bombers would be recruited from the ranks of male muslim arabs or blacks. Thus, virtually everyone else could be waved through to the nude x-ray queue.
However, those awfully nice Fenian Bastards developed an effective suicide bomb during Operation Banner. A JCB digger had a barrel of explosive placed in the shovel, the explosive wired to be exploded remotely and a kidnapped innocent chap chained (CHAINED) into the cab with instructions to drive the digger at a checkpoint. Or else? Or else the victim's family held hostage by the Boys would be murdered. I haven't checked but I expect that the people responsible for this crime were released after the Blair Surrender if caught or were transferred to another parish.
So if you turn up at an airport sweating, looking nervous and extremely stressed despite being white, female, middle-class, middle-aged and C of E thank those awfully nice Irish republican people for inventing another way to kill innocents.

Why We Fight In Afghanistan Number 2,356

Afghanistan has ample supplies of grit. The Government anticipated the present shortage in the UK and arranged for thousands of tons to be brought back in vehicles, helicopters, radios, rifles, trouser turnups, boots and all returning service personnel are ordered to jump up and down on the tarmac at RAF Brize Norton to shake every last grain out.


One little known clause in the Lisbon Constitution places strategic minerals in member states under European Commission control. It has been agreed by the Commissioner that as the weather is colder in Scandinavia all Union grit and salt supplies will henceforth be flown by Airbus to Lithuania for distribution on snowier roads. Foreign Secretary David Milliband responded by giving his little brother Ed (in charge of the climate) a snowball down the back of his neck.
By the way, as it's rather cold in Germany, all natural gas from Russia for the UK will be turned off with effect 3pm todayfor two days so fill your bath with what you need to tide you over.
Well you did vote for the Constitution so why are you moaning?

No Need To Worry About Global Warming Any More

Bescause no matter what even Ed, Gordon and Obama do the earth's ozone layer will be stripped away by a supernova about 3,260 light years away according to The Daily Telegraph. The twin star is called T Pyxidis (Why not rename them Islamofascist and Banker? ) So any finger-wagging twerp planning to achieve the martyrdom of his fellow passengers should perhaps wear another pair of underpants because in the long run we're all doomed to destruction anyway. Apparently the sun will expand in a few billion years and cause a house price slump.
Earth is just the blue ball on the cosmic snooker table of life?