Thursday, 30 October 2008

A Geography Lesson For EU Referendum

In a post today, Dr Richard North described Coventry as "that bit of England stuck somewhere between London and Yorkshire". Which is as daft as those Brummies who claim Birmingham is the second city to London (instead of Coventry).
For the simple fact is that instead of being stuck somewhere between London and Yorkshire, Coventry is the centre of England and therefore the world. Therefore, London and Bradford are places miles away on the edge of the world for the purpose of paid business only.
It is a truth universally acknowledged by the wise that leafy Warwickshire has all the arboreal beauty of the Garden of Eden and, except for occasional soujourns to enjoy the coastal areas of Devon, Dorset and Cornwall, there is no need to leave Shakespeare's county.
And to show there's no hard feelings from me to the irascible Dr North here's his equally nice garden in faraway Yorkshire. So, when the EU, carbon-warmers, windmills and everything else gets too much go into your own oasis and chop a slug in half with a trowel before watching the birds get on with life without a single Directive.

Digressing, I remember the industrial psychologist at the DWP in Coventry (it was during a training course for advisers on mental illness and Jobcentre customers since you ask) disagreeing with me that access to gardens, parks or open country was an important means of maintaining mental health. And I hadn't even said that religious adherence (the opium of the masses, unless we're talking about the underclass when heroin is the opium of those masses) which he argued was very important was actually a symptom of mental illness (magic invisible friend syndrome).

4 comments:

William Gruff said...

I once plotted the dead centre of England, by striking arcs of 85 miles from numerous coastal points and drawing intersecting lines from several extremities, and it happens to be Atherstone, birthplace, I believe, of Larry Grayson, though the good people of Tamworth lay claim to the distinction.

Gallimaufry said...

Actually Larry Grayson was born in Banbury and brought up in Nuneaton by foster parents and was subsequently adopted by his foster sister. The good thing about Grayson was that he was as filthy as the listener's mind. Thus Self-Raising Fred the baker and Pop-It-In Pete the postman.
Meriden is another of the contenders for the geographical centre of England. If you've ever been there, West Bromwich is the true dead centre as at least every other person seems to be a zombie (or zombaaay).

Richard said...

Duly corrected. How could I have not known that?

Gallimaufry said...

Too much time spent in Brussels?
:-)